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I Exist
It's been ages since I have been back on this website, and I simply thankful that I have gotten anywhere near where I am in my current life. Over the course of two years time, I have come across things that have made me question everything, I have found myself in the hospital, and at this current moment I am realizing that those whom are related to me by blood, mean nothing to me. Those who are "family" are corrupt individuals who are full of nothing but false promises, and fake concern. I simply want to restart. I want to start from a blank canvas, with a new name, a new identity, and to forget who I was before. Yes, I will always remember,
13 Words - Happy Birthday.
Art, Love. Cherish and remembering how special deviant art was to me. Savior.
I'm Exhausted..
I breathe in and draw my nails across my back. I hate when we fight, I hate when I get the feeling you're mad at me. I'm too emotional, and I can't make you feel better. I just bring you down with me in my own misery. I just want to hold you and kiss you - but I can't do that. I have to wait weeks until I can do that - and it's hard. I just want to move in with my father and see you every day.. Oh wait - that's right. You still work! You work Monday through Saturday.. Forget it. I can't just have a day alone with you. I feel like I just get a tease of you. I get to feel your lips against mine, and your arms around me and the comfort of someon
Seriously?
I can feel the anger boil under my skin, and the screams that have been longing to be heard ring into the sky. Tell me please, why are you so disappointed in me all of a sudden? All week you've been "So proud." But of course.. Of course the one time that I don't want to do what you do and sit there miserably, watching others enjoy an activity that I have despised my entire life - You're disappointed. It's all my fault, of course it is. When you can't find someone to blame it's suddenly my fault and I despise your personality. I hate who you are. I hate being related to you. I hate living in the same house with you, and every time you suffocat
© 2012 - 2024 Jayjay4578
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This is awful I hope you feel disgusted about it now.